Thursday, November 10, 2011

After all, it's just hair...

One of the "side effects" of gastric bypass surgery is hair loss. Everyone is different as to when they start losing their hair, how much they lose, when it starts growing back, etc.  I had read that on average, hair loss starts about month 3, but for me it started immediately.  The first shower I took when I came home from the hospital and quite a bit of hair came out in my hands as I washed and conditioned my hair.  The problem has just continued since that day.  I have started using Nioxin shampoo and conditioner, which is supposed to help slow hair loss and make hair stronger. But I am not sure it works for me because I seem to still lose hair and some days, I lose a lot.  I don't really have anything to compare it to, though.  Maybe it would be worse if I used regular shampoo?  Who knows.  Right now I think I can "hide" the thinning with the way I style my hair, but I have to wonder what will happen if this keeps up.  If I keep losing hair at this rate, will I end up with bald spots?  Will I need to shave my head and start over?  My hairdresser is so sweet and has offered to go with me to buy a partial wig, an enhancer for my hair to help with the thinness.  I am not sure I am at that point yet, but it is something I think about, especially if this keeps up.  I know my hair will grow back, but it can take a while for that to start happening...like 9 months to a year after surgery.   That is a long time for hair to continuously fall out. The problem wouldn't be as great, I don't think, if I didn't already have thin, fine hair to begin with.  If I started out with a head of thicker hair, I probably woudn't be as concerned about developing bald spots.  Don't get me wrong, I don't regret having the surgery, the hair loss is a minor thing to deal with in the scheme of things and the weight loss is by far more important.  After all, it's just hair, right?  It's just a new insecurity I have to deal with for now...until my hair decides to grow back!

Wednesday, November 2, 2011

Two Months and 40 Pounds Later...

It is hard to believe that this past weekend was the 2 month anniversary of my surgery.  Time has gone by faster than I thought it would in the beginning. I had my 2-month follow up with the surgeon last Thursday and I found out that I had been calculating my weight loss wrong!  I was starting 3 pounds heavier than I actually was, so my weight loss hasn't been what I thought it was.  But that's just fine, we're only talking about 3 pounds here. I'll lose that in a week!  So far, then, the grand total is 40 pounds lost, including what I lost before surgery.  This is all good for sure, and I can see how things are changing - physically and mentally.

 
Since the 4 week mark, I have pretty much eaten whatever my stomach will tolerate.  Thankfully I have not had much in the way of issues with that. My breakfast is always a protein drink, followed by various things for lunch - leftover dinner, tuna or chicken salad on crackers with cheese, lettuce roll-ups with meat and cheese, or salad with some kind of protein. I like taco salads with refried beans, taco meat, and cheese.  For dinner, it's just meat and vegetables and the crockpot helps!  I have avoided bread, rice, pasta, and white potatoes. I have not tried any of those yet, and I really don't see a need to go back to them. I am eating probably about 4-6oz per meal now.


The mental changes come in terms of choices. Choices on what to eat and choices on what to do with my time - as in to exercise or not to exercise, that is the question! Could I have followed this same dietary plan before surgery and lost weight? Yes, I probably could have, but it also would have been much more difficult and I probably wouldn't have stuck to it. It's amazing the hold carbohydrates have on our lives until we are forced to live without them for a little while. I know eventually I would have given in to that. It also amazes me how many carbs are in so many everday foods. It has been incredibly eye-opening to say the least!  I also know that my stomach and intestines have been forever changed on the inside and I know that not sticking to the "plan" could result in me feeling sick...and in the long run, result in regaining the weight. What is the "plan"?  The nutritional guidelines that I am supposed to follow is no more than 20g carbs/10g sugar/10g fat per meal.

I also believe this surgery changes more physically than just the size of the stomach. I just don't have a craving for a lot of things I used to eat. Maybe my tastes have changed, or maybe so much time has passed that I just don't crave or miss it anymore. Either way, it's not a bad thing and it makes it easier to stick with the "plan".  Although I am not eating most carbohydrate-rich food, I do eat whole wheat crackers and have had some of a baked sweet potato with nothing but a little butter added (which was super yummy, I might add!). I occassionally have a handful of Cheez-Its to get that salty snack fix.


I joined the Rex Wellness Center last month and have been going to water aerobics classes. I really like them and I just tried my first body shaping class last night.  I learned the hard way that when class is over I need to take the elevator, not the stairs. My legs wobbled a whole lot!  I am looking forward to trying yoga, and pilates, too. Of course I have days when I don't feel like going, but on the whole I do like it and there are days when I miss it if I don't go due to other things going on. This is also part of the mental change! I love relaxing in the hot tub after classes.  I find having some of that relaxation time after class makes for a happier, less-stressed me when I get back home.  I'm sure hubby, Dylan, and the cat appreciate that!

All in all, I am very blessed to be doing so well!  My accomplishments since week 2 are:

-Losing a grand total of 40 pounds as of 10/27
-Getting OFF of my blood pressure meds - yahoo!!!
-Joining the Rex Wellness Center and getting there 2-3 times a week
-Moving down 1 jeans size
-Moving down 1-2 pants size (depending on the make of the pants)
-Fitting into shirts I haven't fit into in 3-4 years

I am so blessed to have such supportive family and friends to walk this walk with me!  My husband has started out on this journey now, too, and is entering his third week on Friday.  He is hanging in there and seeing results, too (of course, who wouldn't when you're only drinking liquids, eh??).

I will get some new pictures this weekend and post them up here. The last ones I posted on Facebook were at 34 pounds lost (it actually says 37 pounds lost, but that was before I realized I was 3 pounds off!).  Since I've lost at least another 6 pounds since then, I will get some updated ones and post on here soon!

 









Thursday, September 15, 2011

"T" is for Two

This past Monday marked my 2-weeks since surgery.  It also meant a follow-up with my surgeon.  I went to that appointment on Tuesday morning and  I weighed in 14 pounds less than I did on surgery day, so I've lost a total of 25 pounds so far.  I can already see the difference in my face and my clothes are fitting a little looser.  The surgeon was pleased with where I was and told me that my weight loss will slow over the next couple of weeks, and that it is normal to go through periods of more rapid weight loss, and then slower weight loss, and even plateaus on the scale while my body catches up.  But even when this happens, he says, I should still be losing inches.  My next follow-up is on the 9/29 - exactly 1 month to the day of my surgery.

Food-wise, I have progressed to the pureed stage - yummy! LOL  My diet this week has mainly been 2 protein shakes a day, supplemented with 1/2 cup of refried beans & salsa for lunch and 3oz of greek yogurt for a morning and afternoon snack.  So my shakes are my breakfast and dinner.  The problem I found going back to work is...I forget to eat.  I'm never hungry, I don't know what hunger really feels like anymore.  Whatever it feels like, it is not the same as it was before.  If I don't set reminders for myself to eat, I will easily forget.  I am struggling to get my 64-oz of fluids in daily, which I knew would be a problem for me. I was never really good about drinking that before surgery. I am much better now, but still not where I need to be.  I am, however, managing to meet my minimum protein requirements each day...as long as I don't forget to eat!

Accomplishments this week:

1. A 14 pound loss since surgery!
2. Blood pressure meds were cut down to half per day!
3. I was able to wear a shirt on Monday that I hadn't been able to wear since I bought it around Christmas last year.  I bought it without trying it on and then realized it was a little too tight when I got home. Since I bought it in Alabama, I never returned it.  I was happy to see that it is no longer "a little too tight" and fits just right! 
4. I can now wear my wedding ring again without shoving it on my finger.  I developed dermatitis from the nickle in the ring about a year after we got married.  It was from about a 10 pound weight gain after our wedding. I have since not been able to wear it except every so often.  I have been wearing it all week now and so far, have not had any issues. It seems to fit much better now...YAY!
5. Went back to the office.  Yes, this is an accomplishment, although I really miss working from home!

Goals for the coming weeks:

1. Exercise more!  This is a biggie for me!! I need to find something to do and get into a routine!
2. Find a local support group and go!

This has certainly been a process for me, as I know it is for everyone who goes through this surgery.  One good thing, I really have no desire to eat anything sweet. The thought turns my stomach!  However....I would LOVE to be able to have a nice juicy cheeseburger or a big ole slice of pizza! LOL  But alas....I can not....and that is okay.  I am bummed for a moment, but remember the ultimate goal and the tool for the second chance I've been given to make it happen!

Sunday, September 4, 2011

One week Post-Op and So Far, So Good!

Well, my surgery went as planned on Monday Aug. 29th. I arrived at the hospital at 5:00am and they got started prepping me pretty quickly.  I think the surgery started around 8:30am, which was about a hour later than scheduled.  Thankfully, all went well during the surgery. I did have a small hernia that they fixed during surgery, but other than that, everything went smoothly.

From the surgery, I developed something called subcutaneous emphysema.  It is where the air that is pumped into the body cavity during the surgery migrated it's way up into my collar bone area, neck, and face.  My eyes were extremely swollen and I could barely see out of them. I had no peripheral vision whatsoever. I also couldn't breathe well because of the air constricting the airway in my neck.  Once they got me set up on the CPAP machine, though, I was good to go and could breathe much better. So my face and neck looked swollen, but it was from air, not fluid.  It was really a strange feeling. Thankfully it has mostly gone away and my voice has returned to normal.

I had to stay 2 nights in the hospital and was discharged Wednesday evening.  The best thing about coming home was being able to SHOWER!  They did not let me shower in the hospital because I had a drain hooked up to me and I couldn't shower until the drain was removed. They didn't take the drain out until Wednesday afternoon and by that time, I figured I'd just wait til I got home!  It was good to be home again.

So far, so good with the diet. It has been tough, I won't lie.  This has probably been one of the hardest things I have done in my life.  Right now I just long to taste something other than water, Crystal Light, jello, and popsicles. I long to be able to chew my food instead of having to sip it!  Those are the hardest things.  Last night, the boys made popcorn for themselves and it was really hard for me because I love popcorn and that smell just permeated the house.  But I am staying positive and trying to remember that it's just popcorn and one day, I might be able to eat some again, just not right now...and if I never do, the end result will be worth it and it won't matter.  The biggest thing that excites me right now is the fact that I am "graduating" to smooth soups and dairy products so I can finally make my protein shakes with milk again and I can have some Greek yogurt and things like that. It will be such a welcome change from the clear liquids. In another week, I can start on the soft foods and I will be able to do scrambled eggs.

I know I said I was going to post before and after pics, but I got busy before the surgery and didn't have a chance to post the "before" pics.  But...look at any of my Facebook pics...and that is what I looked like!  I will post after pics...I'm aiming for once every month, but we'll see how it goes!  So far I am down 17 pounds total.  I dropped 11 pounds in the 2 weeks prior to surgery by doing protein shakes and then I've dropped another 6 pounds since Monday. 

So that about sums up my week!  I am overall doing very well and feeling good and praying it continues this way!  I am thankful for everyone's support, thoughts, well-wishes, and prayers!!

Thursday, August 11, 2011

Two More Weeks and Counting...

I had my follow up with the surgeon today and I actually managed to drop 3 pounds since the last visit at the end of June. He was happy about that and so was I considering we were on vacation last week and I certainly wasn't watching what I ate! Starting Monday, though, I have to seriously start my protein shake regimen - 2 per day and a "sensible" dinner. I already went down this road with the Pure brand protein shakes that are ready to drink. I did not stay full, so it was a challenge. Somehow I am going to have to manage to get through this. It's only for 2 weeks and then after surgery, I will be full because my stomach will be so much smaller!

I have been on this online support group for gastric bypass surgery and the stories are just amazing. One lady is 7 weeks post-op and has already lost 56 pounds. It's hard to believe that in mid-October that could be me.

Next time I post I will have my official "before" pictures to post!

Wednesday, June 29, 2011

A Hot Date with a Surgeon....in the OR...

Two days after my last blog entry about being submitted to the insurance for approval, I received a call from my caseworker at the surgeon's office that I was officially approved to have the surgery. That sure didn't take long!

Yesterday was my follow up with the surgeon to go over my test results from all of the pre-op tests and assessments that I had to endure. I think waiting the 2.5 hours in the waiting room just to wait my turn was the most painful part (and I was 20 mins EARLY for my appointment)! He said that my test results all look good and that I appear to be in good shape physically, mentally, and emotionally to have the surgery. He said my risks of complications appear slim given my age and test results. My only orders are to try and lose 5-10 pounds before surgery with the "liver reduction diet" - similar to the SlimFast plan - 2 high protein shakes a day and a "sensible" dinner. I had to laugh when he said that, he sounded just like the commercial for SlimFast! The only difference is, I won't be drinking SlimFast shakes, I will be drinking high protein shakes that they sell there or they gave me a few "over the counter" options to try. I think I will start next week, maybe I can drop a few pounds before going on vacation the first week of August. I sure am not going to worry about it on vacation, except maybe to have a shake in the morning. I'm not much of a breakfast person anyway.

So with that, my "date" with the surgeon in the operating room is Monday August 29th. I have to be at the hospital at 5:00am to get ready and be prepped for surgery at 7:30am. The surgery should last about 1.5 hours and I will be in the hospital probably 2 nights, maybe 3. I am hoping for only 2 nights, though! I am definitely praying for a smooth surgery and recovery. Since I don't get paid for being out of work, I am hoping 1 week off and 1 week working from home will be all I need so I don't lose more time (and money). And afterwards, comes the weight loss...and I will be truly on my way to a healthier, and thus happier, me!

Tuesday, June 14, 2011

Another Step Closer

I received a call from the surgeon's office today and they confirmed that all of the reports are in and that they have prepared and submitted the paperwork to my insurance to get approved for the surgery. The review and approval process, they said, usually takes 1-2 weeks. So I should have a definite approval in the next couple of weeks. Then comes setting up the next appointment with the surgeon and setting the date!

Last Friday I got my CPAP machine. It sure is a nifty, high-tech contraption! I have been using it for 4 nights now and I do feel a difference. Today is not a great example because at some point last night, the breathing mask came apart and I just set it to the side. I don't remember doing this and I have no idea how long I slept without it, so I am more tired today than I have been the last couple of days. I am still getting used to it, but it does seem to be helping a little bit. I can't wait until my husband gets his set up to wear, too. I hate feeling like I'm the only alien in the house! Much to my disappointment, the technician who set up my machine for me told me that only 18-20% of bariatric patients ever go completely off of the CPAP machine. That is a very depressing statistic, but I am praying hard that I am one of those 18-20%! But in the end, if I sleep better and have a better attitude because of it, I will be a happier, more active person and that will make it worthwhile!

On another note, my friend and inspiration, Ginger, is now down to a size 6! I am thrilled for her! I pray that I have the will to be as strong and as consistent as she has been in this process!

Wednesday, June 1, 2011

Coming into the Home Stretch

I have officially completed ALL of my pre-op testing/assessments! Woo hoo! Today was the psychological assessment so the doctors can make sure I'm not going to "flip out" after I'm all skinny and stuff. The main thing the psychologist looks for is to make sure it's being done for the right reasons, that you understand the changes - physical and mental - that come with the dramatic weight loss , and to make sure you are mentally ready to be compliant with the new way of eating and living after surgery. Seems I "passed" with flying colors and the psychologist announced she will recommend me as a good candidate, psychologically, for surgery.

As for the meeting, it was very interesting and enlightening. We talked about my fears of life after surgery and also what my hopes and goals were. The main thing I said I was afraid of is the weight loss causing a change in my relationship with my husband. She seemed very supportive of the fact that he and I are going through this together, so we will be able to be supportive of each other's struggles since we will be enduring them together. Still, knowing that the ex-wife walked out 3 years after her surgery (I know, ironic, right?), I am determined to make sure that this does not happen to our marriage. This family does not need to go through something like that again. My hope is that our relationship will grow deeper and more meaningful in ways that we are unaware of yet. All in all, I feel pretty good about taking this step in my life and I am looking forward to getting back to doing things I truly enjoy, but have had to stop doing because I just can't anymore. At 36 years young, I should NOT be saying that and I don't want to lose anymore of my life than I already have!

Last weekend I also completed my second sleep study to get fitted for the CPAP. I should be getting word on that this week...and have my CPAP machine soon. I'm not looking forward to using it, but if it will help me sleep better and feel better, I'm willing to give it a shot! Hopefully once the weight starts coming off, I will not need it anymore and I can return to my sexy sleeping self! :)

So where do we go from here? Well, the next step is to set up my follow up appointment with the surgeon. He will go over all of the results with me from all of the testing I've been through and his office will submit the paperwork to the insurance company to have my surgery approved. Then, we set the date. So we're not quite in the home stretch...but we're getting there and I get a little more excited and a little more nervous each day. But I'm looking forward to life in the long run after surgery!

Tuesday, May 17, 2011

Insecurities...

Well, it's down to the last 2 appointments before my case is submitted to the insurance company for approval of the surgery. I had my sleep study a little over a week ago and found out that I have moderate-severe sleep apnea. So I get to go back and spend the night in the sleep lab again so they can fit me for a CPAP machine. Just what I wanted, to sleep hooked up to a CPAP! Just another reason for me to go through with the surgery. Then, in 2 weeks, I have my final appointment - the psychological evaluation. I am thinking I will have the surgery date set by the end of June.

But...to get on with insecurities. I knew that after this surgery I would not look the same. Not only would I be thinner, but I would have to deal with the flabbiness (a nice way to put it) that also follows. The closer I get to having the surgery, I am starting to prepare myself mentally for what is to come after and I'm realizing that my insecurities aren't going to go away, they will just be different. Right now I'm insecure about being fat. After, I will be insecure about the "leftovers" after the weight is gone. I will have to come to terms with this somehow because plastic surgery just isn't an option, at least not for several years.

I am also starting to pay more attention to food labels so I can start looking at things that will be safe for me to eat after surgery. I think the first month is going to be the hardest, I will need a lot of prayer to get through it!

Sunday, April 24, 2011

Let the Testing Begin!

So a little over 2 weeks ago, I had my initial consultation with the surgeon. I found out that the procedure I really wanted done, the Sleeve Gastrectomy, is not an option for me because my insurance doesn't cover that procedure yet. So, I have decided to go for the Gastric Bypass. Ten days ago, I went for my first set of tests - the upper GI scan, chest x-rays, EKG, and bloodwork. It all went fine, but that barium stuff they make you swallow for the GI scan is nasty. The taste isn't horrible, but it is so chalky and thick - it reminds me of a really thick milkshake but it doesn't taste as good. :) I've already had my follow-up with the Gastroenterologist and he confirmed that my upper GI scan came back completely normal and that he is going to approve me for surgery, no additional testing needed for GI. There was a chance I might need an endoscopy, but I'm happy that I don't! That hurdle is clear, so now the next appointment is on Wednesday for my nutrition assessment. The ball is rolling and I'm starting to get more nervous with every passing appointment. Don't get me wrong, I am not having second thoughts. It's just the thought of going through something so major, especially for someone who has only had 1 surgery in my entire life and it was outpatient! Plus, a 14-year old body recovers a lot faster than a 36-year old body. I know it will change my life for the better, though, and there are so many things I want to do again that have become more difficult as the weight has piled on. I have so much to look forward to!

Tuesday, March 22, 2011

The Consultation

I received the call from the surgeon's office today and have scheduled my initial consultation for April 7th. I'm excited and nervous all at the same time. It is a 2-hour appointment...wow!! I don't remember spending 2 hours in a doctor's office unless it was urgent care or the emergency room! I'm glad to know that the surgeon is going to take his time with the initial consultation, though. Surgery is such a serious step to take and I'm relieved to know that the doctor gives the appointments the time and consideration it deserves. At this appointment we will discuss what procedure I'm interested in and all of the options, as well as begin to set up my appointments for pre-op assessments and tests. The insurance company will approve me for surgery only after all of my pre-op assessments and tests have come back and those doctors have approved me for the surgery. With any luck, maybe I will have these done by the end of May!

Friday, March 18, 2011

And So it Begins: The First Step

Being overweight sucks. I have had the unfortunate "luck" to be overweight since my pre-teen years. I've been on many diets and exercise programs and have managed to lose some weight here and there, but it always found it's way back and then some. I know there are many people out there who can relate to my story and my struggles.

So yesterday I took the first step in what I hope will be a permanent, positive change with my weight struggles. I attended an information session on Bariatric Surgery, which is the first step in a road to surgery and the weight loss beyond. I still need the insurance company to approve me for the procedure, but I am not too worried about that. I am more nervous about being in the hospital for a couple of days since I have never had to stay in a hospital overnight my entire life!

The next step is gathering my medical records from the last couple of years and scheduling the initial consultation with the surgeon's office. At that point, I will decide with my surgeon which procedure will benefit me the most and pursue that one and move on to the next phase of my life. I will chronicle each step in the process on this blog, maybe it will help someone else who is going through something similar.

In the meantime, let us not forget Philippians 4:13: "I can do all things through Christ which strengthens me" and know that regardless of our struggle - weight or otherwise - Christ Jesus is our ultimate strength!